Man, I've been pretty busy since I got back to the cit-ay! Wednesday we had a GREAT KoH show and I ad-libbed a Britney Spears joke that I'm pretty excited about. I don't ever do material about stupid stuff like that but I think the quality of the joke and the fact that it's also a dick joke outweighs the fact that it's about Britney Spears and that we really shouldn't be paying any more attention to her. Also I discovered that spending two weeks in California and having to drive every night greatly lowered my alcohol tolerance. I'm glad to be back where I can drink whatever I want and poorly paid subway operators and taxi drivers have to take me home.
Also on Wednesday we did a photo shoot for a magazine where I got to wear a Hannibal Lecter mask.
Yesterday I watched a bunch of Monty Python (which I'm also doing today). I used to feel like watching them was like going to school but now that I feel the Whitest Kids have kind of established our own style, I can just watch other sketch comedy and enjoy it rather than study it. I still wish we had British accents though.
I also finally figured out the opening scene for an action movie I've been "writing" for like three years now. Now that I can't do anything with it (the strike) I might as well actually work on it, right? I'm backwards. And no, I won't tell you what it's about but I will say that if made it will include a scene of me lifting weights, and I think we all wanna see that special effects extravaganza, right?
Okay.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
WHY AM I UP?
I have to audition for a commercial in, like, seven hours. It's for a whipped cream, so at least I'm very familiar (too familiar?) with my subject.
When I'm on my deathbed and thinking back on my life and everything that I have accomplished, I'll probably be pretty upset about how many times I've clapped and didn't really mean it.
The next stage of human evolution is the Asshole. There's already TONS of prototypes.
Earlier tonight I was forced into a "Support The Troops" round of applause by some dude that's being shipped off to Afghanistan next week. It sucks that you have to go somewhere and have mean people shoot at you and everything, but don't make me applaud for you just because you SIGNED UP FOR SOMETHING THAT IS DANGEROUS. That's why I won't make people cheer for me once I finally join The International Federation Of Competitive Eaters.
Once you break it down to the basics, there's really only two life paths that a person can follow: The Happy Retard or The Heartbroken Genius.
I really only typed all this shit down so that I can remember it for my stand-up set on Wednesday. I hope that doesn't lessen your experience.
Brooklyn is Better.
Good night!
When I'm on my deathbed and thinking back on my life and everything that I have accomplished, I'll probably be pretty upset about how many times I've clapped and didn't really mean it.
The next stage of human evolution is the Asshole. There's already TONS of prototypes.
Earlier tonight I was forced into a "Support The Troops" round of applause by some dude that's being shipped off to Afghanistan next week. It sucks that you have to go somewhere and have mean people shoot at you and everything, but don't make me applaud for you just because you SIGNED UP FOR SOMETHING THAT IS DANGEROUS. That's why I won't make people cheer for me once I finally join The International Federation Of Competitive Eaters.
Once you break it down to the basics, there's really only two life paths that a person can follow: The Happy Retard or The Heartbroken Genius.
I really only typed all this shit down so that I can remember it for my stand-up set on Wednesday. I hope that doesn't lessen your experience.
Brooklyn is Better.
Good night!
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Creek and the Cave Comedy Combo!
Hey dudes! There's lots of comedy happening at the Creek and The Cave! it's this awesome bar in Queens! Tonight, Saturday, and Next Wednesday are some sick-ass shows and they're all FREE! Come on down!
Tonight The Jerk Practice kicks off '08 with some funny sketches and funny guests, including me! That starts at 8!
Then Saturday...
50 FIRST JOKES is happening Saturday, January 5th!!! We are kicking off a new year of NYC Comedy by having FIFTY + Comedians tell their first joke of 2008. This is gonna be huge!!! We're gonna party at The Creek and The Cave (coolest bar ever) all night long…It's gonna be MAKEOUT CENTRAL!!! Not to be missed…
Presented to you by John F. O'Donnell, Claudia Cogan and Jiwon Lee
Starring: JESSE POPP, SAM BROWN, WILL FRANKEN, GIULIA ROZZI, BRANDY & SARA, HEATHER FINK, ERIK BERGSTROM, BRENT SULLIVAN, SEAN O'CONNOR, VICTOR VARNADO, BENARI POULTEN, SETH HERZOG, ADAM NEWMAN , CHESLEE CALLOWAY, JON FRIEDMAN, BRYCE RICHARDSON, KUMAIL NANJIANI, SEAN PATTON, ELIZA FARIA-SANTOS, JAMIE LEE, CHARLES STAR , LANG FISHER, ROGER HAILES,VINCE AVERILL, JORDAN CARLOS, ERIC ANDRE , MATT RUBY, MARGOT LEITMAN, DAN NEWBOWER, NICK MARITATO, KATINA CORRAO, CRAIG BALDO, MATT MCCARTHY, LIVIA SCOTT, CAROLYN CASTIGLIA, GLENNIS MCMURRAY, AUBREY TENNANT, OREN BRIMER, JAY BOIS, CASSIDY HENNEHAN, BECKY CILETTI, JACKIE MONAHAN, SARA BENINCASA, ANDREW WRIGHT, TOM MCCAFFREY, RACHAEL PARENTA, BRAD STEUERNAGEL, DAN CURRY, TIMMY WILLIAMS, THE JERK PRACTICE, JOHN KNEFEL, JOSH FILIPOWSKI, LISA KAPLAN, RG DANIELS, GREG JOHNSON, GABE AND JENNY, CLAUDIA COGAN, JOHN F. O'DONNELL, and JIWON LEE
Then next Wednesday the 9th is the first KINGDOM OF HEAVEN of 2008! I won't be there but John Mulaney will! You've seen him on Conan O'Brien and various other televised programs, and he has 20 minutes of non-stop amazingness prepared for you!
And this all goes down at:
The Creek and The Cave
10-93 Jackson Ave.
Long Island City, NY 11101
www.thecreekandthecave.com
718-706-8783
By Subway
7 to Vernon/Jackson (one stop from Grand Central). Exit onto Jackson Ave. Walk one block north to 49th Ave.
E or V to 23 St/Ely Ave. Exit onto 44th to Jackson Ave. Walk five blocks south on Jackson to 49th Ave. Please note that the V train does not run on weekends.
G to 21 St/Van Alst. Exit onto Jackson Ave. Walk 3 blocks south (away from Citibank building) to 49th Ave.
By Bus
Q67 to Jackson and 46th ave.
B61 to 49th Ave.
Tonight The Jerk Practice kicks off '08 with some funny sketches and funny guests, including me! That starts at 8!
Then Saturday...
50 FIRST JOKES is happening Saturday, January 5th!!! We are kicking off a new year of NYC Comedy by having FIFTY + Comedians tell their first joke of 2008. This is gonna be huge!!! We're gonna party at The Creek and The Cave (coolest bar ever) all night long…It's gonna be MAKEOUT CENTRAL!!! Not to be missed…
Presented to you by John F. O'Donnell, Claudia Cogan and Jiwon Lee
Starring: JESSE POPP, SAM BROWN, WILL FRANKEN, GIULIA ROZZI, BRANDY & SARA, HEATHER FINK, ERIK BERGSTROM, BRENT SULLIVAN, SEAN O'CONNOR, VICTOR VARNADO, BENARI POULTEN, SETH HERZOG, ADAM NEWMAN , CHESLEE CALLOWAY, JON FRIEDMAN, BRYCE RICHARDSON, KUMAIL NANJIANI, SEAN PATTON, ELIZA FARIA-SANTOS, JAMIE LEE, CHARLES STAR , LANG FISHER, ROGER HAILES,VINCE AVERILL, JORDAN CARLOS, ERIC ANDRE , MATT RUBY, MARGOT LEITMAN, DAN NEWBOWER, NICK MARITATO, KATINA CORRAO, CRAIG BALDO, MATT MCCARTHY, LIVIA SCOTT, CAROLYN CASTIGLIA, GLENNIS MCMURRAY, AUBREY TENNANT, OREN BRIMER, JAY BOIS, CASSIDY HENNEHAN, BECKY CILETTI, JACKIE MONAHAN, SARA BENINCASA, ANDREW WRIGHT, TOM MCCAFFREY, RACHAEL PARENTA, BRAD STEUERNAGEL, DAN CURRY, TIMMY WILLIAMS, THE JERK PRACTICE, JOHN KNEFEL, JOSH FILIPOWSKI, LISA KAPLAN, RG DANIELS, GREG JOHNSON, GABE AND JENNY, CLAUDIA COGAN, JOHN F. O'DONNELL, and JIWON LEE
Then next Wednesday the 9th is the first KINGDOM OF HEAVEN of 2008! I won't be there but John Mulaney will! You've seen him on Conan O'Brien and various other televised programs, and he has 20 minutes of non-stop amazingness prepared for you!
And this all goes down at:
The Creek and The Cave
10-93 Jackson Ave.
Long Island City, NY 11101
www.thecreekandthecave.com
718-706-8783
By Subway
7 to Vernon/Jackson (one stop from Grand Central). Exit onto Jackson Ave. Walk one block north to 49th Ave.
E or V to 23 St/Ely Ave. Exit onto 44th to Jackson Ave. Walk five blocks south on Jackson to 49th Ave. Please note that the V train does not run on weekends.
G to 21 St/Van Alst. Exit onto Jackson Ave. Walk 3 blocks south (away from Citibank building) to 49th Ave.
By Bus
Q67 to Jackson and 46th ave.
B61 to 49th Ave.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
